I know I've been writing less and less here, and to be honest, I've been making less and less art. It has nothing to do with a lack of ideas or artist block. It's just that nowadays I have zero energy. The fatigue I always associated with my hardwork and art school, and months after saw as a post-art-school jet lag, turns out to be associated with the chronic pain I've been dealing with for quite awhile now. In the past 6 months, it seems to have gotten worse and worse, and while we have a pretty good idea what it is, it's the kind of thing that can only be diagnosed with surgery, or taking some crazy pill (with all sorts of weird side affects) that would cost $800 a month. Yikes. So for about 2 weeks, I had non-stop pain that seemed to top off the 1-10 scale they always ask about. I've been to the ER and an urgent care center and a specialist, trying to find a painkiller that will work, and for whatever reason, after about 3 days, my body tends to fight them off and make me miserable once again. It's hard enough to get through 12-hour shifts when all you want to do is crawl up in a ball, so on my days off, I haven't felt like doing much of anything except for sleeping and watching tv. We finally found some medicine that's helping with the pain for now. Unfortunately, it also makes me incredibly sleepy for a couple hours after taking the pill, and once the drowsiness wears off, I end up terribly nauseous and lightheaded. But I have to stick it out for another month before we think about surgery or expensive pills.
I really don't like posting too much personal stuff on here, especially anything negative. But I feel like I owe some sort of explanation. Hopefully we find a solution soon, and hopefully I get all my pep back. I have plenty of ideas for new projects once I find the energy. Until then, please don't worry.
Oh, and I've been having crazier dreams than usual lately. (My mom blames my meds.) The other day, I dreamt that I finally had a sheep named Beatrice, who was born in a golden egg. So I've been doing a few sketches during lunch breaks based on that, mostly because Beatrice was so beautiful in my dream. I don't mind this side effect.